▼ May 02, 2024

A look back with my notebooks

Like any normal teenager who just discovered stationery and has access to convenient online shopping, I ended up buying quite a bit of notebooks as I experimented a lot with my journaling style. I was going through my treasure troves boxes that my parents still have kept filled with knick-knacks and trinkets from years ago when I found relics and written evidences of how cringe and emotional I was for a 16-year-old lmaoo but reading through the notebooks now as an adult just made me feel wistful inside.

Most of these notebooks are from when I was in college (2016 earliest), unfortunately I don't know where my journals from high school went but if I ever find them I'll update this entry for more cringe content (I was definitely more emo when I was 13 years old whaaa).

It goes without saying that this page will be image-heavy and you can click the pictures to see it in full size. I will also be redacting personal information for privacy but I still want to share these notebooks nonetheless ^_^

First is this... moldy notebook LOL oof, excuse the unsightly mold, it's been untouched since... 2018? I bought this from a local leather shop who also makes notebooks, yay for supporting local business! The sticker in front is a Sailor Moon vinyl sticker that I got from a friend. I really like how I designed my front page: the postcard with the nice quote is from papemelroti and I printed the BTS concept photo and the poem I got from tumblr (I can't search the title and author, smh 2018-me why did you not cite the author!!) and various cat-theme sticky notes and tabs my sister gifted me. I tried to emulate the most basic bullet journal method here and would sometimes customize the layout more to my liking. I started this notebook on October but I moved to a different notebook at the end of the year so it was just... 1/4 full. I included a sample of my monthly page. I think I kept up with the routine well! Godd reading these entries actually makes me laugh, I have been suffering with life for so long...

Next is this pair of notebooks I got from papemelroti. As you can see college-me's go-to brand is papemelroti because it's cheap but the quality is very good, their stores are like heaven to me; they're the definition of whimsical. I got these two along with the postcard on the previous notebook as an impulse purchase because I couldn't resist the cute cat artwork! I used these on 2019, the green one as my korean language learning notebook (I used Talk to Me in Korean books) and the red one as a reading journal that I didn't get to use as much as I wanted to. Looking back at it now, I really like the format in it. I don't know where I got it from lol but I might use it whenever I'll make a books page here.

This is... 2016 I think? My second-year in college. I don't exactly remember how I got this notebook but I just saw it in my huge pile of notebooks and decided to use it for that semester since it was undated anyway. According to my scribbles here, I apparently opened a studyblr that's chemistry-related and I wanted to make this planner as "aesthetic" as possible so I'll get lots of notes and followers. Omg... girl. You know the good thing about keeping journals is stuff like these blasts from the past and it just makes you realize just how much you've changed through the years.

This notebook was my ride-or-die companion through my Broke Bitch-Unemployed Era when I graduated on 2019. I wrote here every night about my frustrations in job hunting and every failed interviews I went through. I still followed the basic bullet journal layout here, but its pages are mostly filled with journal entries. I think this was when I had enough of unrealistic bullet journal pages that no neurodivergent person would ever accomplish in a day, let alone more than a month, so I went back to basics to figure out what I really need in my notebook. I had to take a picture of my Pokemon Sun endgame checklist as me and my husband (who was still my bf back then) were playing Sun and Moon together, there was so much stuff to do! 2024 Update: I never finished them, not even my pokedex, oops. I think this notebook holds the most sentimental value to me because it was with me through thick and thin, and it contained my hopes for the next year as I step into 'adulting'. Man, 2019 was perhaps the last time ever I planned out my life. I learned throughout the years that I'm better off winging any decisions that come my way.

This was the notebook I carried everywhere during my hospital internship on 2018. We had to memorize every single medicinal product and medical devices in the pharmacy and I can recall things better when I write them down so half of this notebook was just product and generic names of those medicines as well as its classifications. Another notebook I picked from my pile and it was of good use to me ^^b

This is a Rhodia notebook my mom got for me and on a random day on 2018 I decided I want to draw. This was also when I was obssessed with League of Legends women and K/DA so I drew a lot of Morgana, Ahri, Kai'Sa and Akali. These were the good ol' days when I would just draw whatever I want, hence the random Djeeta, Megurine Luka and my Miqote WoL. I criii I miss this drive to draw, I wonder when will I get up from my art slump...

This was a notebook my mom bought for me on 2016 when we went to a christmas bazaar that we regularly go to. I know I used this on 2017 because of the 'Sakura Angels' line there and I still remember that being gifted to me by my husband (who was only my friend back then... omg!) as a joke in Steam. Also this page just reminded me how I had a silly little crush on Jesse from NEST (yes.... the FFXIV raid group LOL) I didn't keep up with it unfortunately and only got until February.

This was my very first A6 notebook and I just bought it because of the cute cat cover when my best friend brought me to a store which stocks different products from local artists. The pattern should be very obvious by now, I'm weak to anything related to cats. The quote in my key page is a line from RM's solo 'Trivia 承 : Love', I popped off with that lettering and flowers LOL And would I be a Totally Normal GBF player without a spark tracker? Okay, listen, I wanted CheVira so bad! I wrote about going to a Wanna One concert with my sister here so I assume this is from 2018 and yet another unfinished notebook tehe!

This is just a freebie we got from Forever21 years ago. Maybe in 20 years I can call this a vintage piece LOL Totally blank, I haven't used this at all but still I want to include it here.

My first Moleskine notebook! I got this during my Melbourne trip on 2020 and it was on discount yay ;D I wanted a grid notebook like Cheyenne Barton (one of my inspirations in bullet journaling) but I'm a stingy girl so I went with the dotted one because it was the one on sale LOL The sticker on the cover is a Summoner job crystal sticker I bought from Supanova artist alley so I get a grim reminder everyday that I main a job that will always be reworked every expansion :")) After my success in my 2019 journal, I've been more and more confident in my journaling/planning style. This was less experimenting but more on improving my layout or adjusting based on my current situation. The layout may be kind of neat but the contents aren't... ^^" I got seriously thrown off by the pandemic and other life events. I didn't know my mental health could get lower than when I was in college, so my journal entries are darker and more hopeless tone-wise in this notebook.

For 2021, I moved to Midori MD and this is where I became a grid truther. I'm really pleased with how this notebook turned out! I definitely have found my groove here and accepted the fact that I have free will and I don't have to pretend to be a minimalist when I can put all the stickers and washi tapes I want because I can and it's my space. I moved on from the bullet journal method and figured out my own system that works for me. I was still recovering from 2020 life events so I completely threw any kinds of planning out the window and just focused on journaling (or if the need arises, I just use a sticky note). Thankfully I discovered all kinds of medias that made life worthwhile again. My entries have become hopeful again, but not in the 'looking forward to the future' kind but more of 'I'm just happy to be where I am right now'.

Bonus!

Other pages from the notebooks above that I want to share~

The moment Taisho x Alice changed the trajectory of my life. Ahhh, still remains to be one of my favorite otome game! Nothing will ever make me feel the same way Kaguya's and Wizard's routes did, so of course I had to write it down and take all the time to print that very accurate reaction image solely for that page.

My washi tape collection from 2021! I was in my hoard mentality back then and even until now I still haven't finished all of them yet lol It was also why I stopped buying stationery in bulk/hauls because I didn't like having my stash full of things I haven't used at all. I really like doing washi tape swatches in my notebooks, it's so satisfying to look at them all lined up neatly :"D

More drawings! The lily was a watercolor tutorial I followed from Shibasaki Watercolor in Youtube. And I was practicing drawing me and my then-boyfriend's WoLs so I could draw something for our anniversary.